Been in a very dark place, mentally, for weeks, on and off. You wonderful people are the only thing keeping me going sometimes.
I need your comments. If you read my comic but never comment, now’s your time to make your voice heard. Even if it’s just “HEY!” I’ll take it. Seriously. Silence feels like hate to me.
With that said, I hope my mental state doesn’t negatively influence the comic…TOO much. Heh heh.
I’ve been feeling in a bad place too lately. Hang in there 😀
I’m here! I love the comic, but don’t feel too bad about any delays, especially for health/mental health reasons. For me, missed updates are just a thing that sometimes happens. As long as there’s an update of some kind (text blurb is fine) addressing the missed update, then I don’t worry that you’ve abandoned the comic (specially for a lengthy gap in updates). Basically, keep up the good work!
I’ve really enjoyed your comic for months now. I just haven’t said so. Sorry.
I really appreciate this comic, Speedball. Thank you for continuing to work on it!
Re: today’s update: I think Greg is another person comparing his uncut footage to everyone else’s highlights reels.
I just try to make my uncut awesome enough to crush most peoples highlights. Success has yet to set in. (=
Knowing that this is a reflection of the author’s depression issues makes it even creepier.
Are you on meds, incidentally? They can genuinely help.
Reader feedback have less negative sideefects than meds, if it helps as well …
“HEY!” =P
The impressive thing about this storyline is that you are having the characters pull themselves out of peril, it’s far better writing then having some shiny new outside force show up and fix it all. Good job, as usual, keep it up. *(Obligatory quality takes time comment)*
I just wanted to say that I love this comic and to wish you well in your life
Time for Kili to return the favor.
I think he can get out of this alone. He’s stronger than maybe he himself gives him credit.
Ironically enough, his low self esteem is one of the things under atttack here. In the end he might make it, but I could see it being (much) harder for him than for Mori.
I have been reading your comic for several years now and through changing URLs. I like the premise & storylines. I appreciate the genuine improvement in your artistic talent.
I have also gone through the Valley of Doubt & Despair. Your personal journey may not always take you along the mountain ridge where you have a clear vision of what is yet to come, but things do get better.
Never got around to having anything to say about the comic, but have been reading for probably ~4 years or such? Started when it was still on drunkduck. Your comic has probably the most creative and interesting situations and characters in it of any that I’ve read and I like it a lot, so thanks for making it for all this time.
Hey Speedball, I followed you here from deviantART. I don’t usually have anything to say, but I’ve been avidly following the comic since the release of Chapter 1.
*Boops your nose.*
*Hugs* Hang in there, man. I know it gets rough, but it gets better. It helps to have a way to channel that despair, though.
Also, I know I don’t comment all the time, and am often rather flippant when I do, but this is one of my all-time favorite webcomics, and I’ve been reading (mostly quietly) since Greg was introduced.
Dear lord. They’re not just Writer’s block demons. They’re DEPRESSION demons. Those are the worst kind!
Hey! Okay, I’m done.
…
But seriously, been there, done that. Lots of self-doubt and low ego. Keep at it, and find what makes you content, if not happy. You have friends, you have followers, you have more <3 sent your way than you realize. Doubts will stay, and sometimes you'll need to distract yourself to diminish those doubts, but even if they sometimes win a battle, you can win the war.
Meanwhile, have an imaginary truck full of supportive hugs and candy.
Hang in there man! It is thanks to you that we can enjoy the adventures of the Dragon Doctors and without you the story won’t exist.
You know I’ll never stop reading, man. I’m here, quietly nodding with approval, but when I have something to say, I’ll say it.
Stay strong, man. You inspire me to get out of my rut and do better, to produce something and get it out there. I know you’re on the road to something good.
I’m also reminded of a quote from Winston Churchill: If you’re going through Hell, keep going. 🙂
Hello!
Well… another nobody loves me attack from the demons. Maybe that’s a way to get them? I mean it seems seriously effective, but if they always use the same one. Though twice is not always.
Not quite, the demon that attacked Mori tried to convince her of her own irrelevancy, sucking out her humanity into itself, this one is more trying to make all the love in Greg’s life feel like emptiness.
Also Jesus Christ, I ask for comments and I get them! This outpouring is amazing.
Heh, you asked for it. And you’ve got quite the loyal reader base. Never doubt that! 😉
I must say though that this attack, other than the one on Mori, seems a little bit improvised. A little bit less planned through. (Which makes a lot of sense, if you think about it.) The demon leaves a few openings there, an edge to hold on to and spin this around.
Of course those are always easier to spot from the outside. But still, Greg might pick up on that and pull through. I’m curious of what you’ve planned here.
He is a very important person to Kili. he did save her life no doubt about that. I am sure he got ALOT of Things to be proud of… but the demon makes sure he forgets that under doubt and sorrrow.
Making me think if his wolf side will have a Word with that demon. Oh well i think too much sometimes.
Speedball. keep this up. i really like to read that.
I love your comic and I know you’re a great person! And I will keep saying both :3
Hey, broseph. You know we love you. Never forget that.
I don’t post that much, but I am a regular reader. I really like the characters, plot, dialog, and storytelling of this comic; recently I started at the beginning and read all the way through the archive again. The comic is worth it.
Also, I’m looking forward to seeing Greg win. I don’t know how he’ll do it (and who, if anyone, will help him) but I’m looking forward to it.
This comic is one of my favorites. We all have rough patches in life. Best of luck!
Hey, keep on writing.
Your familiarity with despair, as a writer, makes these demonic adversaries seem all the more real and dangerous. You know well how all the good in life can seem to become insignificant, and the bad magnified into mountains.
What I enjoy about your stories is that you take ideas and concepts that are often normal and familiar, but then twist them and create a new perspective.
…Not that I’m saying depression is good. It sucks. But your experience and understanding give you another artistic tool to work with, another color in your palette.
[palpatine]Yess…feel the depression flowing through you, let it give you strength. Soon your journey to the Gray side will be complete…[/palpatine]
Well I hate commenting if I don’t have to say anything regarding the comic itself. The only thing I have to say right now is, that I love your comic. But this seems so obvious to me, I shouldn’t have to say it. However, since you asked so nicely: I love your comic very much and am glad it exists.
That was the wrong email, but that probably doesn’t bother anyone but me.
I’m just going to go on record again as saying this has been one of the more…bland storylines (despite it being one of the largest and longest). Why? Because despite the few really nice moments, this has (and please note that I don’t mean any true hate by this as I love this comic and is one of the few I still read) been “My trip through depression” inserted into the comic. Every demon aside from the Incubus has, so far, been entirely about making people feel sad and worthless.
It has gotten a bit stale to me.
Yes, it is true that ‘all the demons we could see were hunted down and banished’, but surely there has to be some kind of emotional state demon out there that doesn’t just prey on people’s own despair and makes them go through the (what has been so far) repetitive ‘you’re not important’ schtick. Once we’re done with Greg, are we going to go through the same routine with Elka? Are we going to see it be even worse because of her already horrible self-esteem issues? I don’t know if I can take what amounts to two pity parties back to back.
Sorry if that sounds harsh. Again I’m not trying to hate, but you’ve definitely slid offtrack as to what I feel an interesting and dynamic story should be.
What about a demon that feeds of seething anger? Demons that exist on things such as duplicitous intent or hidden greed? Things that are not blatantly obvious and that we, as humans, hide in private.
Regardless, we are at the climax of the story. Stuff like this is slowing the story down and doesn’t need to be here. Personally, I would have played up the Phoenix Fire within Elka a bit more than just ‘fireproofing’. Have any attempts to be possessed by a demon just end with a panel of a glorious phoenix spirit radiating out from Elka (with or without her knowing or understanding what it is) and getting rid of the demon so that they can continue on with saving the day.
There will be time for character exploration like what you’re doing now later, after the battle. Play up the angle of ‘depression’ and ‘self doubt’ in Greg, Elka and Mori, have them be affected by what has been done to them not by directly sitting down face to face with the thing causing the problem, but by having differing coping methods that do change their relationships with the rest of the cast, temporarily or permanently. Hell it can even allow you to have a reason for further demonic threats in the future (with all the sad sack stuff being incubation for the demons as a way to survive).
TLDR version is: All this ‘you’re not worth anything’ is coming off as author insert and is throwing the story off. There are different ways to approach the topic in a much more organic storytelling way.
Erk. Your comments are not falling on deaf ears.
I think I see some of what you’re getting at.
First, I, personally, find this sequence interestingly different from Mori’s sequence, and would keep both. These attacks can definitely be overlabored – I wouldn’t include an attack on Elka on-camera, for example – but the angle through which this demon is going after Greg is very different from the incubus’s attack on Mori. The attack on Mori was very obviously metafictional, going after anxieties she didn’t really have that it created; this one is preying on fears that Greg has had for a long time (and telling us more about Greg’s life in the process).
Pacing is very difficult in a first-draft page-by-page-updates medium like webcomics. The pacing of this storyline is on the rough end, but that doesn’t really bother me. I’m enjoying it. 😀
That could be very cool. Self-doubt like Greg’s is not the only kind of suppressed emotion, and a demon that drives people with emotions like anger or acquisitiveness would make for interesting situations.
Speedball… Your writing is top tier. I’m a self-aware jack ass and mean critic. I shoot down a lot of popular stuff and usually I’m pretty mean about it. I know a person trying their hardest when I see it, and your writing for this comic is worthy of a steady paying job. That said, I would volunteer my time to help draw this comic for you if I could draw better than you, but I can’t… Thanks for being your self and pouring your heart into this fantasy world. It’s been inspiration for many a Dungeons and Dragons campaign and I hope you don’t stop till you feel the story is truly complete.
Don’t stop writing Speedball. You said it yourself through your self cameo earlier, “I’m the only one who can write this story.” You are one of the most creative and clever writers I’ve ever seen. The plot is original, the characters complex, and the writing smart, funny, and heartwarming all at the same time. I never want to see the Dragon Doctors go away because you’ve made me fall in love with all of them. Don’t listen to anyone who says you aren’t good enough because you’re one of the best I’ve ever seen. If they can’t see it, then just keep creating your wonderful stories until they do.
In this comic, having plenty of despair and doubt to draw upon really helps make it realistic. I know you don’t update every day, yet I find myself checking the site multiple times a day hoping for something new. I wish I knew what to tell you about depression, but I can tell you that I look forward to every new comic. {{{Speedball}}}.
glad greg has color still, wonder if its possible to just blow these demons off. ‘yeah that sucked, so what. i went on and will continue’
I just stumbled across this comic a few weeks ago and I love it. Things are dark for me as well and updates on my favourites comics like this one are often the best things that happen any day <3
I would be very very very sad if this comic didn’t keep going. Very very sad.
You are a great person, Speed. DO NOT give up. And if you think you can’t go on anymore, think of your fans. Think of all the people you bring the joy with your stories.
And in case it doesn’t work, just look to what I’m doing daily, since last september, on dA; http://darkhogdarkhogini.deviantart.com/gallery/51160536/Drachenwelt-Chronicles
You can do it and it will be great. Have faith… and stay put – those demons are not to be trusted ;).
As you can see from this, we all appreciate your work. Go you.
I hope you feel better soon.
The days get lighter man. You’ve been kicking ass and taking names with this story. Keep it up. 🙂
“The greatest glory in living lies not in never failing, but in rising every time we fail.”
Nelson Mandela